23 Months - Best Friend!

So this is your last letter as an only child and as a one-year old and I'm not quite sure where to start. This last month has been full of more changes - are you sick of it yet? I know that your dad and I are. On the one hand I can't wait for the new baby to get here so we can resume "normal" life as a family that lives in the same home, but on the other hand I am not so naive to think that life is going to return to "normal", at least as we knew it, when that happens.

I'll be honest with you kid, I am to the point in this pregnancy where I am starting to panic. This is normal and doesn't mean I don't want your baby brother or sister so don't go running around telling them they weren't wanted. Well at least it is my normal, I did this when I was this far along with you too. I remember very clearly being very pregnant and uncomfortable sitting on one of our ratty old couches on a May evening 2 houses ago, looking over at your dad as we peacefully watched tv uninterrupted and getting almost physically ill knowing that life wouldn't ever be like this again (well, not for at least 18 years). Luckily something happens to a mom when she becomes a mom and even though life is undeniably harder than it was, it is also undeniably better. So, while I may be to my "panic" stage of pregnancy, that doesn't mean I am not looking forward to introducing you to your new sibling. If one child can make your life better (and harder), than I'm sure two only doubles the good things as well as the hard things. Your life will be better too. Sure it might be harder at first and occasionally throughout the years, but you will also always have someone in this world to be your friend, your ally, and most likely your partner in crime.

Ok, moving on quickly so I am not seen crying at my desk... Your dad got to go to the Arizona/Mexico border for 3 weeks during this last month. It was a great detail for us - a 3 week detail is great any time, let alone so ealry in the season but it was tough for everyone. You and I got to wrap things up at the house in Enoch and your dad had a tough time being away from you so long. Occasionally you'd talk to him on the phone and tell him about your day - you developed this cute habit of talking about your day and/or the things you saw at that moment. You'd narrate our drive home from Carter's house like this:

Go to Wal-Mart AAAND Donald's House AAAND House Depot AAAND Trees AAAND Sheep AAAND School AAAND...

Your dad enjoyed these conversations a lot more than the ones where all you did was scream about how you didn't want to talk to daddy on the phone. When someone would ask you where your dad was you would reply "Working in 'Zona". You're smart, have I told you that before?

Last month when I wrote your letter I mentioned that you were sick again, well apparently it was two of your two-year old molars coming in and it was NOT fun. When your dad got home last week we had planned to let him take you to Kanab and hang out and have fun together. Your teeth had other plans and you got your "Two-Year Old Molar disease" again and your dad had a less than "fun" couple days. Sure you gave him a great welcome home by sticking to him like glue for the first night you were home but then he was on his own with a child in pain. The bad thing about this last bout with the "Two-Year Old Molar disease" is that only one of them came in - we still have one more to go. I am going to keep every last tooth that falls out of your head in a few years because we have all worked very hard for them to get here.

You and I finally got to spend some good quality time with dad this last weekend when we went to Kanab. We spent Friday unpacking and making the house seem more like home and then got to do yardwork and chill with dad on Saturday. We took you to the elementary school park in Kanab and although I didn't have my camera (where did I pack that anyway?), I think the picture in my head from that night will stay with me forever. The sun was starting to go down and there was a nice breeze so it was finally comfortable enough to be outside. The sprinklers had just been on and had left puddles on the blacktop basketball court there. Your dad and I settled down on an old red wooden bench with most of the paint peeling off and watched while you ran through the puddles and back out again to see the "tracks" you made with your bare wet feet. We stayed there for quite a while just watching you enjoying the nice breeze and the peace of having one happy child. When we got back in the car you had us laughing as all of a sudden you yelled at your dad "Don't worry 'bout it!" He kept hassling you and you kept telling him the same thing over and over - which we'll probably see repeated when he starts bugging you about a girl you like or a school assignment with an upcoming deadline. Maybe that's one of the things you learn when you are a parent, how to enjoy simple things like sitting at a park watching your kid run around just being happy - and then laughing at their expense...

Last night as I pulled you out of the tub and had you snuggled in the towel giving you a big hug with your wet head against my cheek you pulled away and looked right into my face and said "Best Friend". Whoever taught you the phrase "Best Friend" gave me a huge gift. I was surprised because I had never heard you say that and hadn't taught you that phrase so I asked you if I was your best friend and you said "yeah". I melted and completely forgot the stress from earlier in the evening when I had sent a text to your dad that simply said "No more kids". If they are all like you I want a million more.

Next month you'll be two and a big brother and I can't wait to see what our new "normal" is when these two events happen because I know that even if it is harder, you'll only continue to make it better. Thanks so much for that.

Your best friend,
Mama